Day 351: A Funk of Sorts

Well, to report back on those sun dried tomato habanero tortillas, they are indeed delicious! I'm going to keep trying out new kinds after I'm done with each pack.

So, I think it's safe to say that in the last week or so I've fallen into a funk. I'm not sure

what brought it on but it's likely the point in my life that I'm at. It's very weird to go from being at school everyday to realizing the rest of your life will be spent working. I know some people enjoy them, but cubicles drive me fucking nuts. It seems almost like a jail cell with a computer at work. I'm stuck in it for eight hours of the day. How most people eat their lunches at their desks boggles my mind. I need to get out of that building for an hour to clear my head and just be outside enjoying the day.

It kind of hit me that for most people, working everyday for the rest of their life is what will likely happen. I don't want that. I need to find something to do to where I'm able to create my own hours, work wherever I want and not need to work everyday. I mean don't get me wrong, I understand the economy is not well and I'm very grateful to have a job in the field I w

ant to be in. I'm just realizing I won't be happy if this is what I do for the rest of my life.

Last semester I realized that you have to be doing things that bring you pleasure and you look

forward to everyday. Right now, I'm missing that in my life. There's nothing I look forward to when I wake up, except going to sleep that night. Which is why I say I'm in a funk. I'm really evaluating everything and trying to figure out what I want from life and how I can achieve that. I'm really not pessimistic but no one has any idea of how long their life is really going to be.

You could live to 100 or you could die tomorrow, no one knows. So I want to spend as much time of my life absolutely enjoying what I'm doing. Waking up each day excited about what the day brings. Not dreading it wanting to stay in bed.

So while my goal of this blog is to be in a red bikini, I really just want to be at a point in my life where I'm entirely happy with everything--my body, my mind, and what I'm doing in

life. Anytime that I start to get down on things, I like to look at pictures and remember the beauty there is naturally in the world. I think that's something I've realized, I want to be out in nature more than confined to a cubicle.

Here are a few pictures that I can't help but feel good when I look at...